My current practice explores the need to express emotions and reflect on experience through an artistic practice, utilising language, drawing and painting to push the boundaries of stereotypical self-portraiture. Self-reflection, obsession and insecurity are conveyed through drawings, journals and text to comment on conflicting aspects of identity and process such as honesty and secrecy, confidence and uncertainty, immediate expression and artistic block. To represent this duality of the human experience, the confessional and contemplative are shown alongside the presentation of every-day conversation, sketches, materials and journals to create a chaotic and emotional experience for the viewer, exposing aspects of my identity and artistic process.
‘A Self-Portrait in Pink’ is an installation that uses the materials around me – discarded boards, sketchbook pages and the studio walls – that reflects my thoughts, experiences, dreams, environment, emotions and coping mechanisms through immediate recording. The exposing elements of this installation, the size and the vibrancy, stand to contradict the impermanent use of the studio walls, loosely taped paper and imperfect appearance. The colour Pink is also explored for its contrasting elements to sadness, anger and resentment – at a glance appearing innocent and childlike. The connotations of femininity and sexuality that the colour holds clashes with the representation of vulnerability and the confessional – a representation of the fragility of identity and emotions.
Stepping into these three walls should create an overwhelming atmosphere, triggering the viewers own emotions and memories to discover relatability and understanding, studying their own reflection within my work.
Mae fy ymarfer presennol yn archwilio’r angen i fynegi emosiynau ac i fyfyrio ar brofiad drwy ymarfer artistig, gan ddefnyddio iaith, tynnu lluniau a pheintio i gael gwthio ffiniau hunan-bortreadaeth stereoteipyddol. Caiff hunan-fyfyrio, obsesiwn ac ansicrwydd eu cyfleu drwy luniau, dyddlyfrau a thestunau i wneud sylwad ar agweddau o’n hunaniaeth sy’n groes i’w gilydd a phroses megis gonestrwydd a chyfrinachedd, hyder ac ansicrwydd, mynegiant ar y pryd a chyfnodau hesb i’r artist. Er mwyn cynrychioli’r ddeuoliaeth yma yn y profiad dynol, caiff y cyfaddefol a’r myfyriol eu dangos wrth ochr cyflwyno sgwrsio bob dydd, brasluniau, deunyddiau a dyddlyfrau i greu profiad emosiynol a hollol ddi-drefn i’r gwyliwr a fydd yn amlygu elfennau o’m hunaniaeth a’m proses artistig innau.
Mae A Self-Portrait in Pink yn osodiad sy’n defnyddio’r deunyddiau o’m hamgylch – byrddau wedi’u taflu o’r neilltu, tudalennau o lyfrau braslunio a waliau’r stiwdio – sy’n adlewyrchu fy meddyliau, fy mhrofiadau, fy mreuddwydion, amgylchedd, emosiynau a’m mecanweithiau ar gyfer ymdopi drwy eu cofnodi yn syth. Mae elfennau’r gosodiad hwn sy’n datgelu, sef ei faint a’i fywiogrwydd, yn gwrthddweud y defnydd dros dro ar waliau’r stiwdio, papur wedi’i dapio’n ddiofal a’r olwg amherffaith. Caiff y lliw Pinc ei archwilio hefyd am ei elfennau sy’n cyferbynnu â thristwch, dicter a llid – gan roi’r argraff wrth fwrw cipolwg arno o fod yn ddiniwed ac yn ymdebygu i blentyn. Mae’r arwyddocaon o ran benyweidd-dra a rhywioldeb sydd gan y lliw yn gwrthdaro â’r bregus a’r cyfaddefol sy’n cael eu cynrychioli – cynrychiolaeth o freuder hunaniaeth ac emosiynau.
Dylai camu i mewn i’r tair wal yma greu awyrgylch a fydd yn gorlethu, gan brocio emosiynau ac atgofion y gwylwyr eu hunain iddyn nhw gael darganfod ymberthnasedd a dealltwriaeth drwy astudio eu hadlewyrchiad nhw eu hunain yn fy ngwaith.
